Last night I had organised to meet a friend for dinner, but due to the fact he couldn't meet me until later in the evening, I decided to do some Christmas shopping (for my sins) while I waited.On my way to Forbidden Planet (who am I buying pressies from there for I hear you ask? ME, of course) I happened to bump in to a friend I haven't seen for ages, and we went for a quick drink.
Now this friend of mine (let's call him UT for Ultra Trendy) is what I would call a beautiful looking man. And I mean beautiful in the true sense of the word. He has one of those faces that is perfectly structured - high, scuptured cheek bones, flawless skin, perfectly formed features. (Me? Jealous? Never...) I wouldn't describe him as handsome - he is most definitely beautiful. He was born here in the UK, however, his parents are both Chinese.
UT had been 'dating' a guy for a couple of weeks and wanted to talk about it. Basically, this guy had seemed really keen at first but on Friday UT saw this guy at Popstarz 'smutting' someone else. UT was understandably very upset about it.
What interested (and upset) me was UT's response to this situation. Instead of reacting as I would have done (the guy's a prick, I deserve better, he can go *&$£ himself), UT did the exact opposite. The entire time I was with him, he spoke about the fact that he was obviously unattractive; that he had decided this guy must have had a problem with the fact that UT was 'Oriental'; that all UT saw when he looked in the mirror was the shape of his eyes.
Now, I recognise that many people have self image issues, but what upset me most was the fact that UT's seemed to revolve around his ethnicity.
Who or what has given him the sense that being 'Oriental' made him a lesser/uglier person?
14 comments:
I'm wondering what the attitude is in th UK about Oriental people. Or is there maybe some reason UT has low self-esteem? Why didn't you ask him?
Matters of the heart can do screwy things to ones head. UT is just feeling a little insecure.
That is *so* sad that someone so obviously beautiful would feel that way.
I *hate* the word Oriental. Ew.
I don't think this attitude is specific to the UK, dabich, do you?
running42k I guess the heart can screw with one's head, indeed.
anhoni, I *hate* the word oriental when referred to a person also... but it is used here.
Non-white people in predominately white countries have been brainwashed to view themselves as inferior in the looks department.
I think the word you are looking for is Asian.
Maybe he hasn't become comfortable with his ethnicity.
It's also an easier scape-goat to blame physical attributes, rather than believe it's your personality that has caused a lack of interest.
The dangermous man: well...at least you're honest...now, pay tell, how exactly does one "get more beautiful"? Inquiring minds wants to know.
Scribe, I think you may be on to something.
Angel, 'Asian' refers to a very broad group of people here, and someone Chinese would refer to themselves as 'Oriental' in the UK. It is not a term I feel particularly comfortable with.
DM - I'm all about the smoke and mirrors!
dangerous: ah, thank you. but what about hair?
Personally I think "Oriental" people are much more beautiful than Caucasians. It's just my opinion. Anhoni...no offense meant, it's just a word used to describe their origins. I myself am not rascist, and I try to keep an open mind on most things. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Personality can only make one more beautiful, or more ugly. The most beautiful person is ugly if they are a mean, cruel personl
"A 3 month sunbed subscription (and possiobly the ability to renew)
-A whole wardrobe of new clothes (mainly Harvey Nichols, Selfridges and at a push TopMan) "
Is Dangerous Man a spoof you created, Ziggy? :-)
"I'm a sunbed queen and addicted to it." ... I am pale and proud, I don't wanna resemble a satsuma or increase my chances of skin cancer, thankyou! :-)
Cue 'Little Britain' sketch ...
"Oh, you mean the ching chong Chinaman?"
Mwwwwaaaaahhhhaaaaa
Oh, come on, I'm only joking, lighten up.
"Get more beautiful" - I nearly peed myself laughing. All you need is a tan, some new clothes and a mullett.
Mwwwwaaaaahhhhaaaaa
that ching chong chinaman sketch is my favourite *ever* Little Britain sketch.
that, and oompa loompa...
ooooohhhhh you're so evil, Dan and Nick... I love it.
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