08 December, 2005

Cosmetic Concern

Last night I had organised to meet a friend for dinner, but due to the fact he couldn't meet me until later in the evening, I decided to do some Christmas shopping (for my sins) while I waited.

On my way to Forbidden Planet (who am I buying pressies from there for I hear you ask? ME, of course) I happened to bump in to a friend I haven't seen for ages, and we went for a quick drink.

Now this friend of mine (let's call him UT for Ultra Trendy) is what I would call a beautiful looking man. And I mean beautiful in the true sense of the word. He has one of those faces that is perfectly structured - high, scuptured cheek bones, flawless skin, perfectly formed features. (Me? Jealous? Never...) I wouldn't describe him as handsome - he is most definitely beautiful. He was born here in the UK, however, his parents are both Chinese.

UT had been 'dating' a guy for a couple of weeks and wanted to talk about it. Basically, this guy had seemed really keen at first but on Friday UT saw this guy at Popstarz 'smutting' someone else. UT was understandably very upset about it.

What interested (and upset) me was UT's response to this situation. Instead of reacting as I would have done (the guy's a prick, I deserve better, he can go *&$£ himself), UT did the exact opposite. The entire time I was with him, he spoke about the fact that he was obviously unattractive; that he had decided this guy must have had a problem with the fact that UT was 'Oriental'; that all UT saw when he looked in the mirror was the shape of his eyes.

Now, I recognise that many people have self image issues, but what upset me most was the fact that UT's seemed to revolve around his ethnicity.

Who or what has given him the sense that being 'Oriental' made him a lesser/uglier person?


DaBich said...

I'm wondering what the attitude is in th UK about Oriental people. Or is there maybe some reason UT has low self-esteem? Why didn't you ask him?

running42k said...

Matters of the heart can do screwy things to ones head. UT is just feeling a little insecure.

Anhoni Patel said...

That is *so* sad that someone so obviously beautiful would feel that way.

I *hate* the word Oriental. Ew.

ziggystardust73 said...

I don't think this attitude is specific to the UK, dabich, do you?

running42k I guess the heart can screw with one's head, indeed.

anhoni, I *hate* the word oriental when referred to a person also... but it is used here.

scribe said...

Non-white people in predominately white countries have been brainwashed to view themselves as inferior in the looks department.

angel, jr. said...

I think the word you are looking for is Asian.
Maybe he hasn't become comfortable with his ethnicity.
It's also an easier scape-goat to blame physical attributes, rather than believe it's your personality that has caused a lack of interest.

The Dangerous Man said...

I am the vainest person I know and when I see someone who I think is better looking than me it drives me to get more beautiful.
I get jelous BIG TIME when I see good looking lads.
I think that most people underestimate how good looking they really are.

Anhoni Patel said...

The dangermous man: well...at least you're honest...now, pay tell, how exactly does one "get more beautiful"? Inquiring minds wants to know.

ziggystardust73 said...

Scribe, I think you may be on to something.

Angel, 'Asian' refers to a very broad group of people here, and someone Chinese would refer to themselves as 'Oriental' in the UK. It is not a term I feel particularly comfortable with.

DM - I'm all about the smoke and mirrors!

The Dangerous Man said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Dangerous Man said...

To get more beautiful requires just two things, set out below;

-A 3 month sunbed subscription (and possiobly the ability to renew)
-A whole wardrobe of new clothes (mainly Harvey Nichols, Selfridges and at a push TopMan)

Anhoni Patel said...

dangerous: ah, thank you. but what about hair?

DaBich said...

Personally I think "Oriental" people are much more beautiful than Caucasians. It's just my opinion. Anhoni...no offense meant, it's just a word used to describe their origins. I myself am not rascist, and I try to keep an open mind on most things. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Personality can only make one more beautiful, or more ugly. The most beautiful person is ugly if they are a mean, cruel personl

Dan Project 76 said...

"A 3 month sunbed subscription (and possiobly the ability to renew)
-A whole wardrobe of new clothes (mainly Harvey Nichols, Selfridges and at a push TopMan) "

Is Dangerous Man a spoof you created, Ziggy? :-)

The Dangerous Man said...

The hair is a perception thing. Most 'trendy' gays in the village go for something along the lines of having the back and top longer than the sides. It looks quite cool, but it all depends on how much wax you use and how tidy you can keep it.

I'm a sunbed queen and addicted to it. I cant escape, and much harder than you would first imagine. Once you see results you NEED to go again and again.

Dan Project 76 said...

"I'm a sunbed queen and addicted to it." ... I am pale and proud, I don't wanna resemble a satsuma or increase my chances of skin cancer, thankyou! :-)

Nick Stephenson said...

Cue 'Little Britain' sketch ...

"Oh, you mean the ching chong Chinaman?"


Oh, come on, I'm only joking, lighten up.

"Get more beautiful" - I nearly peed myself laughing. All you need is a tan, some new clothes and a mullett.


ziggystardust73 said...

that ching chong chinaman sketch is my favourite *ever* Little Britain sketch.

that, and oompa loompa...

ooooohhhhh you're so evil, Dan and Nick... I love it.

Anonymous said...

Excellent, love it! »